SCREAM VI
C-
Ashley really, really wants to see SCREAM VII. As much as SCREAM V disappointed me, it took a lot of coaxing and convincing to get me to sit down and watch SCREAM VI.
The short of it? I liked it better than I did SCREAM V.
The long of it?
I find the two main protagonists rather cliche, trope & to be quite honest, boring. Sydney Prescott was a genuine, authentic & organic. It was easy and believable to see her grow and progress from helpless damsel to kickass heroine, in the course of the films. The two sisters seem forced, feministically placed and to be quite frank, generic. I believe good characters should be written from the inside out, which is what made Sydney Prescott so real and so relatable. Samantha & Tara seem written from the outside in, which I think makes for a weaker connection.
The films have always stretched the imagination, but even the slightest attempt of being realistic let the door hit it in the ass on the way out a long time ago. It's become so tongue in cheek, that it's impossible to watch the film as a fan of horror or a fan of thriller. It instead becomes more of an anesthetic watch of analyzation and technique. Which is maybe what they're going for?
It was comical to see a girl stabbed twice in the stomach, on the same night, sprint and hop happily into the back of an ambulance. At least in the first few SCREAM films the characters actually acted like they'd been stabbed.
If I haven't complained enough, I haven't even hit my two biggest gripes yet.
If the goal is to be clever and original, and the film makers want to hear the praise for it as they pat themselves on the back, then why make the killer's defeat the same pathetic mess up? The film drove home the point of "being different", "fresh" & "original." Yet it put this particular area, the area that begged hardest for something new, on repeat. Killer reveals thyself, makes the mistake of over explaining the what they're doing, the how they're doing it and why they're doing it. Gives the protagonists enough time to react, overpower & defeat. If they finally come up with an ending that isn't this exact formula, then maybe they can graduate from a self-pat on the back, to a self-kiss on the ass.
What bugged me most? Gail Weathers making rookie mistakes and unexperienced decisions. I can forgive quite a bit, but this is where I draw the line. I was almost willing to give this film a B until the scene where the Ghostfaces attack Gail in her apartment. This is a character that ought to be so schooled in preparation that she could fight off the killers blindfolded, with one hand tied behind her back. Five SCREAM films, her demise should come from extraordinary trickery. PENN & TELLER type of foolery. Instead, we damn near see the character killed off from a cheap parlor trick.
The fact that Gail was in the film, along with bringing back Kirby earned points with me. Having Kirby play a significant role and get her flowers in various scenes earned points as well.
I appreciated the beginning and the clever hook that was used.
Like I said, I did like it more than SCREAM V, so there's a small hope within me that maybe I'll like SCREAM VII more than I like both SCREAM V & SCREAM VI. I will say that I have my breaking point. I had it with the HALLOWEEN films. I said that if I thought HALLOWEEN KILLS really sucked, I wasn't going to allow HALLOWEEN ENDS to disappoint me even further.
That'll be my stance on SCREAM VII too.
It has to rate a C+ or higher, or it'll be the last SCREAM I ever watch. The bar was raised pretty high with SCREAM, SCREAM II & SCREAM IV. I expect something at least as good as SCREAM III, or I'm done.
Hope Miss Ashley is paying attention.
